Ground-Breaking Stories From the Journal, “Duh”
Yet another ground-breaking story from the pages of the medical journal, “Duh.” I was reading the news the other day and this article I came across struck me as amazing: Two Women Sue `Girls Gone Wild’ Creator
This is about two girls who were invited onto the Girls Gone Wild (GGW) bus, given free drinks — which they didn’t complain about at the time — and did sexual things on tape and didn’t think that the tape would be seen by anyone else. All I am thinking is no matter how bad a person the creator of Girls Gone Wild may or may not be, these girls have no right to sue him because they are stupid. This is a frivolous lawsuit. If you don’t want to be on the Girls Gone Wild DVDs then don’t go on the bus and let someone tape you having lesbian sex. I’ve never done that, therefore I am not on the dvd.
Anyway, this post is for articles of things you find stupid, such as girls going onto a GGW bus and doing lesbian acts without thinking it would get out. And possibly discuss the issue(s) at hand.
And hopefully you all recognize the Norm MacDonald reference.
For those of you who have yet to watch the short-lived series, Arrested Development (one of the best shows of all time, you can borrow the DVDs from me), they had a GGW parody on there called “Girls With Low Self-Esteem,” which I think is just brilliant.
Those stupid girls deserve to be known as nothing more than “sluts” all ’round the trailer park; they got what they ordered. Not sticking up for the low-life creator, but I agree w/ Kevin: the answer to “how do I not get into a GGW video” begins and ends w/ not taking your clothes off/having sex in front of strangers w/ video cameras. End of story.
Additionally, I’m guessing leeching attorneys follow those film crews around like traditional ambulance chasers…
Actually, now that I think of it, everyone in that article can just die. There. I should’ve just made that my comment.
As a recent fan of the show (uhm, I may or may not have borrowed Bill’s DVDs and watched all three seasons within a week,) that was the first thing that came to mind when I read the post.
And while.. I may not think they should all die for being stupid (ahem..) they should definitely not be profiting from it by means of winning a lawsuit.
Speaking of stupid drunken people suing after seeing how ridiculous they look on film… I wonder how all of those Borat suits played out… didn’t the frat guys in the van try suing him? (along with everyone else in the world.. but theirs seemed more relevant to the post…)
Man Fails High School Exams 39 Times
Maybe it’s my boy, Bing:
I need to teach you folks about hyperbole. 95% of everything I say is either purposely exaggerated and not meant to be taken seriously or just a complete lie to get a chuckle.
(Yes, “95%” was also hyperbole. It’s actually only about 90%)
This is not from an article, but a letter I received a few days ago. My insurance company is defending me in an auto accident where the OSU student who is suing declined medical treatment at the scene and was stoked because she’d been nagging her parents for a new car. The day before the statute of limitations ran out, she sued for lots of money claiming soft tissue injury. The letter says that the case, which is set for trial this month, has been continued and postponed until some date yet to be determined because “Plaintiff’s counsel was playing golf, fell off a cliff, and apparently badly broke his ankle.”
First, I am grateful that my attorney didn’t just say “he was injured” or “needed a continuance”. What a thoughtful man for sharing the fun details with me. But the guy who fell of a cliff- what a moron! And this is coming from a VERY clumsy person. HINT: if your ball is that close to a cliff- take a stroke and move your ball!
So since Salman Rushdie was knighted, Muslims want Sir Osama bin Laden?
For Father’s Day, the Bush twins made their dad a “mix tape.” Some idiot lawyer wrote a letter to the RIAA saying that the girls should be prosecuted for copyright violation, estimating the possible infringement at upwards to $1.8 million.
The coward has since edited his site (and also written a retraction — actual letter is here) but here’s the text from a cached version of the guy’s first blog entry on the matter:
Fact of the matter is, you ‘re allowed to make copies of your own (legally purchased) music for non-commercial use. Apparently this really talented lawyer didn’t look into that before he got all cocky and released his hot air onto the internets. Nothing makes you like like a good lawyer like blasting the president’s kids and then retracting it.
Stinky, when I read this I thought of you….and smiled.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070726/hl_nm/pepsico_aquafina_dc
pepsico telling me bottled water is from “public sources” is a lot like when vince mcmahon told us wrestling was “sports entertainment”
“Some schools help parents by gathering all necessary supplies in ready-for-school packages. Of course, that usually comes with a slight markup that allows schools to make a few bucks on the transaction”
“slight markup” = increased taxes.
this mom Dispatch writer is trying to be sneaky…
The British don’t understand the concept of negative numbers.
There’s a scratch off ticket where you win if the number you scratch off is lower than the number displayed on the card.
Also, the chick’s name – Tina Farrell – makes me think of the product of a union between Tina Fey and Will Ferrell. Everyone take a moment and ponder the possibilities.
my favorite comment about the subject
i may have to test my kids on this to see how many pass
http://www.yahoo.com/s/753458
just an update on your gypsy news
I’ve always said that you gotta let gypsy law govern the gypsies. And I’ve also always said “Ignorance is the Gypsies’ weapon against the outside world.”
I would think the best way for a person named Steve Stevens to distinguish himself from his swarthy cousin “Black Bob” would be to go by the name… Steve. But I don’t know if I could resist the call of a great nickname like “White Bob (as opposed to swarthier Black Bob)”, either.
Promoting gay awareness in schools.
1. Don’t assume a student has a mom and dad b/c they could have homosexual parents.
2. Taunts or comments using the word “gay” as an insult should be treated w/ “zero tolerance” in the same way racist remarks would be handled. (example from article: “that pencil case is so gay”)
3. The UK school official launching this initiative is named Mr. Balls.
i think it would be gay to initiate an anti-gay initiative.
balls
I was just on the verge of scoffing at the gay awareness rules too, but the it occurred to me that it actually has a broader application. LOTS of kids don’t have a mom and dad for whatever reason. I remember when I was grade school my parents were divorced, and I more or less only had a mom – and then later on “guardians”, which made me feel pretty uncomfortable when I was asked if my mom and dad were coming to whatever school function was applicable at the time.
It may be mild hassle for the teacher to remember to say “parents” instead of “mum and dad”, but it’s a small enough thing – and it keeps kids from feeling even more self-conscious than they already do about things that are not in their control. Nobody ever really likes any kind of paradigm shift – it probably took people a long time to remember not to say “negro” anymore too.
And I’m still not clear on why homosexuals are called “gay” in the first place, so I don’t get too worked up hearing a kid refer to his homework as gay. Many perfectly respectable words get commandeered for use as insults.
Here’s sort of a flipside to that article
http://www.nwfdailynews.com/article/11724/1
He’ll certainly be keeping his job.
Oh, and also – balls.
Well if that’s what the ACLU says the principal said then I’m sure that’s it word for word.
Heh heh, you said “balls”…..that is so gay!
Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot that the ACLU constantly lies about all things.
(hyperbole vs. sarcasm = lulz)
I know the ACLU can be overreactive – but I can also picture a very conservative minded principal, tired of watching the morality he values slip away, blurting out his frustrations in a harsher than intended way.
Wait . . . gay as in stupid, or gay as in dudelove?
Those gays at the United Negro College Fund still haven’t caught on.
Gold, Scott. This is good action.
Well sure they can say it. Sheesh.
For the record, I was going to go with the more offensive term, but opted out so this site wouldn’t pop up on some lists of hate sites. But I trust you still take my meaning.
“If I finish, I’ll do what I always do and have a pint and a fag,” he said. “People ask what is my secret but I haven’t got one. They say fags and booze are bad for you—but I’m still here, aren’t I?”
just made me giggle for a sec…
ATM gives out free money
This may be an opening to a different thread on general morality, but if in this situation there was no way for the bank to trace the withdrawal, would you? Some say that banks screw you on a regular basis anyway.
You regular Farkers, keep an eye out for a follow-up. I’d like to know how the banks are going to go about enforcing this. I’m sure they will…
Someone please explain to me why this is news:
http://guanabee.com/2008/03/meet-thomas-beatie-hes-pregnan-1.php
I see a headline that says pregnant man and it’s *not* in a tabloid so I click on it. Turns out, dude is transgendered, is on hormone treatments and whatnot, but still has all the womanly bits down below. Sooo . . . a person with a vagina and uterus is carrying a baby. Correct me if I’m wrong, but hasn’t that actually happened maybe once or twice in human history?
I’m not even coming at this from any kind of moral stance – this is just people being retarded. They’re treating it like it’s some kind of miracle. Maybe this should go in the walking on eggshells thread because I’m not respecting his right to be recognized as a pregnant man.
Yeah, that’s stupid. It’s a woman having a baby. Score one for science. Take that God [shaking fist].
Some of the comments were stupid too. How is that “brave?” Or any more brave than anybody else tackling pregnancy for the first time? Because she’s knocked up but looks like a man now? Bravery isn’t what it used to be…
I considered tacking on a pic of David Crosby or Schwarzenegger.
I guess it could be considered brave in the same way that it’s brave to be openly gay/transgendered/otherwise unconventional. You just know some redneck somewhere is looking to drag someone like this behind his pick up.
I think someone in the comments mentioned this, but why go out of your way to be a dude, and then do something to highlight your femaleness?
Just out of curiosity, would any of the guys here carry the baby if it were feasible and your lady could not?
What kind of science-fiction question is this? Or are you trying to lure out any trannies on the site?
i have to say the best comment on this story is
don;t ask me what it means, it was random and caught me as funny.
So I’ll take that as a “no” then.
Ever since the ladies started to emancipate, the men-folk have been coming in and doing all their jobs (not to mention, getting paid more for it). Like nursing. And now, motherhood.
Which is kind of ironic, since the seahorse male births the babies. Was this intentional?
No, but only because adoption is so much more humane than resorting to medical trickery to get kids. I’d rather help an already conceived child than use sci-fi technology to impregnate one of us.
/ not a tranny
// not sure how that question even relates to this story
/// hasn’t got lady parts
//// would really like some peanut butter, some ice cream, and six weeks off of work
///// NOW!
I’m really getting tired of this “diversity” crap. This is part of an article that was in the news today:
On Thursday, Oprah introduced Oregon resident Thomas Beatie to anyone who hadn’t yet heard of him. Beatie, a transgender man who is legally male, is six months pregnant with his and his wife’s child. La Winfrey called the expectant situation “a new definition of what diversity means for everybody.”
To read the rest: http://buzz.yahoo.com/buzzlog/91294
[Moved to this thread by Bill]
Darren, you’re a little late to the party here. See comments above…
What kind of party is this?
http://www.newsweek.com/id/132536
Time Warner continues to suck:
Time Warner Tests Metered Internet Usage
Let’s say you’re straight-laced and don’t pirate or download tons of porn. You still have all sorts of services that use your Internet connection nowadays: iTunes and the like, Netflix, Tivo, Xbox Live and other online gaming… not to mention just how bulky software downloads and patches have become. Even your casual poking around on YouTube adds up fast. If TW gets this off the ground, the others will follow suit.
Airlines are considering treating passengers “as freight” to combat rising fuel costs.
Can you imagine if our country imposed this law?
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/06/13/world/asia/13fat.html?no_interstitial
Re-education. That’s awesome. They may go too far, but this country could use a little bit of that stuff. Or I could use it in my house anyway. Americans would raise such a stink about it though.
I thought the word, “metabo” was funny.
I wonder how they came up with the standards such as a 33.5 waistline for men? Last I checked, we didn’t have Levi’s that read 33.5 waist on the tag. Then again, this isn’t Japan.
More on ISPs charging by volume.
Quote of the day, from that article:
As the technology company Cisco put it in a recent report, “today’s ‘bandwidth hog’ is tomorrow’s average user.”
I didn’t say that, did you, Seth?
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080616/ap_on_re_la_am_ca/cuba_elian_gonzalez
We should have kill@d him when we had the chance!!!!
In Japan, you’re a hog if you UPLOAD more than 30GB per DAY.
Anyone know how much a flight to Kyoto might be?
Pretty cool story for a change. No doubt they’ll make it into a movie soon. http://www.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/americas/07/03/hostage.drama/index.html#cnnSTCVideo
Oh man, I read this and laughed so hard. I like how this guy was only the second visitor to the museum since it’s opening that day.
Not sure if this is the right thread, but I liked the article.
“What’s Right With America”
http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/07/10/beck.rightwithamerica/index.html
He said he had no intention of doing anything illegal, he just likes irony.
Is it because I’ve always lived in Ohio that I’m not comprehending the current injustices towards African-Americans? I’m by no means racist…I even have a few friends & coworkers that are black, but how many times do we need to apologize for the slavery days?
Or maybe its the fact that I see multi-millionaire black athletes every time I turn on ESPN that is blocking me from understanding that blacks are still being mistreated, I dunno.
http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/07/29/house.slavery/index.html
We’re one step closer to being as amusing as the British parliament. (Be sure to check the “more updates” links too.)
“Is not Oasis the greatest British band since the Beatles? Can we not vote on this?!“
DOews anyone still look at this website?
Anyway, i somehow ended up on this webpage: http://weblogs.newsday.com/entertainment/celebrities_blog/2008/08/ali_lohan_auditions_for_porn_l.html
I’ve never even heard of ali lohan until a few minutes ago, but after you read the article i was wondering if anyone has seen breast wishes 14? I watched the first 13 and they were good, but i must have missed 14 somehow. Seriously though how many Breast Wishes can a person have.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080809/ap_on_re_us/cloned_dogs_mormon_hostage
I’m gonna go ahead say $53,000 is a bit too much to pay for cloning your dog. If you have 53 thousand dollars to clone a dog, you could probably do something better with your money. Besides if you really want a dog similar to the dog you have then you should breed it with another dog.
Also, i don;t know anything about the 1977 abduction scandal but i’m gonna go ahead and say this woman is guilty.
From the dog cloning article:
Context alone tells us that these are not the same person, but that Bernann is a clone of Joyce.
My brother sent me this article about the US water polo team. I thought it was kind of humorous and slightly informative.
I actually watched a little of the u.s. women’s match with the netherlands. I remember noting how intimidatingly beefy the ladies were.. in a very athletic “muscular thighs larger than my entire body” kind of way. The helmet/ headgear things don’t really soften them up any either… This article sheds a little more light on why that may be attributed to more than just swimming laps in training… I also took note of the fact that you, in essence, dribble the ball with your face while you swim… hmm.. interesting sport… even more interesting article.
Only at Denny’s.
Those crazy coke-heads…you never know what you’re going to get when you are open 24 hrs
http://www.cnn.com/2008/TECH/09/10/lhc.collider/index.html
Enjoi
Yes, let’s downplay the issue further by encouraging profs to ignore the problem at the college level as well.
Here are the things that are ruining spelling skills:
instant messaging
text messaging
spell check
popular music
Note: it made me smile to see “memorise” in the article. Those brits can’t spell anything right…
This might even fit well in Bill’s new thread “Random Acts of Rural America”. I read this article about Hurricane Ike and about some of the people who stayed behind to protect their homes. They mention finding a drunk man waving at the rescue team while woman in the rescue shelter gave birth in the bathroom. But I thought this quote was excellent:
“Sedonia Owen, 75, and her son, Lindy McKissick, defied evacuation orders in Galveston because they wanted to protect their neighborhood from possible looters. She was watching floodwaters recede from her front porch Saturday morning, armed with a shotgun.
“My neighbors told me, ‘You’ve got my permission. Anybody who goes into my house, you can shot them,’” said Owen.”
It’s a funny vision to me, an old woman and her shotty sitting on the front porch in flooding waters waiting….. And what kind of neighbors are okay leaving the old woman to defend the neighborhood? Why not the brawny 30-something yr old who works at the gun show/ World’s Gym for a living? And if she sees someone breaking into a house down the street, is she really able to tread through the waters?
Using GPS to find Jesus
And nothing better reflects Christ’s humble birth than an $1800 baby Jesus.
What I don’t understand is why Joseph and Frosty are playing dreidels. Or why Deborah Lauter thinks that the wind that vandalized Chabad Lubavitch’s menorah was being anti-semitic.
Maybe, like Christian kids who have no expectation to know it’s wrong to steal, the wind will go back to being a good member of its faith come January 2.
Also, was I the only one who loved the fact that the company sells LightningGPS to congregations to protect their holiday statuary?
Yeah, specifying that their “previous biggest scare involved the wind knocking down a menorah” seemed a little mocking to me.
Also, I’m finishing that “Battle for Christmas” book by Stephen Nissenbaum that was mentioned right now (b/c I didn’t get through it last xmas and lost interest after the holiday). It’s pretty interesting. I also like that his name makes me think of Steve Martin in The Jerk:
Man this article makes me so mad. I HATE it when the paper towel dispenser is empty…
are you mad because the store doesn;t have a towel dispenser in the mens restroom anymore?
I’ll go ahead and say no towels is annoying, but shouldn’t make you want to break things. He should be fined and publicly ridiculed.
Magic Goat Arrested for Attempted Car Theft
Man caught smuggling 14 live birds in his slacks
Also, looking at that picture, I’m thinking a fella’s gotta be sporting some formidable flares to safely and effectively house birds on his legs.
great stuff – what country is the goat story from?
I knew that this coming Saturday was International Migratory Bird Day… but I didn’t realize that THIS was how they did it.. very clever, very clever indeed…..
I think it was Nigeria.
And yes, we are also known as The Harvard on the Hocking.
Are you confessing something here, Kelsey?
Ha! No, sadly I was not involved in setting couches on fire and blinding police horses. Besides, 8,000 people shoved into Palmer Street sounds like my own personal Hell.
One of my house rules ahs always been “Never get your strippers off of craigslist” ! Use yellow pages like everyone else.
Kev, is this your grandma?
Quite a woman!
This is ridiculous: Cameras keep track of all cars entering Medina
The concept alone is bad enough, but why on earth does a town of 3100 people need to record and identify (and hold in their db for 60 days) every car that enters their city limits?
Concerning the Medina article, I liked this quote:
I also thought it was very bizarre that a community with only 11 burglaries total last year would need all the surveillance.
ER nurse sues cop for handcuffing her during dispute over drawing suspect’s blood
Mary, Mary, Mary, you’re glib….one crime is too many.
Those strata: the rich and the obscenely rich
I thought this article was a little bizarre. I hate to admit this but in the hospital, cops/security/medics/nurses all stick up for each other. At least where I work they do. There is the occasional dispute between us. What’s interesting here is that the cop was giving an order for the nurse, when in fact I never ever give lab results to the cops, whether it’s a positive drug screen or positive alcohol. That’s an issue with patient confidentiality. And why would she only draw the labs when the patient is admitted? You need evidence to back up your reason for admission so you need to draw labs when patients first get to the ER. None of the article makes any sense to me.
I heard this on the news in the car (watch that video) and the sound of her voice in the clip reminded me of Netti Bo Dance, Amy Poehler’s character in the Appalachian Emergency Room sketches.
That video was great. I like how she only used the pools balls because she couldn’t find her crossbow. That’s somewhat scary now that I think of it….how do you misplace a weapon, esp when you have children at home?
http://www.wired.com/autopia/2009/10/motorized-la-z-boy/
Christmas is just around the corner guys… it might not be too late to bid
“… he insisted he was just a ninja…”
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091120/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_squeegee_attack
Standard news template
I hope to someday be described as “dowdy kitchen man.”
Cat of death
This is so sweet. Looking at it from a nursing assistant’s point of view, it’s comforting to know that when you have a dying resident, there’s someone sitting there with them consistently (even if it is a furry someone) through their final hours. I deal with a lot of grief over not always being able to spend that time with a resident, whether it’s because I have 10 other people I’m caring for or because I simply happen to be off that day. I’m sure this cat is very loved by everyone who works alongside him.
Fact: Cats steal souls.
i would totally expect the “Cat of Death” to be wearing a bandana and carrying a switchblade in his paws
http://videogames.yahoo.com/events/plugged-in/wii-fit-owner-falls-off-balance-board-gets-sex-addiction/1396655
this is one reason why i hate america sometimes
“In Texas, for example, a shoplifter – his lawyer says he admits to the crime – is suing Walmart for $100,000 over the dislocated shoulder he claims employees inflicted on him”
It came from this article and it makes me angry that someone would even think that this is ok. Not just the idiot shoplifter but the lawyer who is telling him his “rights” If you are shoplifting and get hurt being tackled by an employee that you are stealing from, then so what. You got what you deserved and hopefully a little more.
anyway it came from this article
http://www.inc.com/news/articles/2010/04/sprint-fires-employees-for-pursuing-shoplifter.html?partner=yahoobuzz
Yeah, that kind of crap really ticks me off too, Kevin. Everybody has rights, regardless of what they’re doing to anybody else.
Who saw this law coming? A happy meal will never be the same again.
Do I smell a Waterworld 2?
Headline of the day
http://www.lancastereaglegazette.com/article/20100624/UPDATES01/100624005
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/07/01/AR2010070106247.html
This story was intersting to me. Either the man is crazy, or he has so much affection for math that he would not prostitue it for a mere 1 million dollars.
What a creep: Making money by suing bloggers for reposting news stories
Health Inspectors Shut Down 7-Year Old Girl’s Lemonade Stand
Of course the rest of this story is that the little girl was going to add rat poison to batch #2 because the cartoon pig in her head told her to.
Rights Groups Join Criticism of WikiLeaks
It’s good to see criticism coming from various sides.